Have you had enough excitement now…more than you ever did?

About a year ago I was avidly reading the IBD (International Business Development) blog from Haas written by business school students working on projects in developing countries. I’ve just arrived in Gabon, Africa a few days ago, and up until about an hour ago, sans luggage. Last year I spent some time in Eastern and South Africa for a project. I had heard that Gabon was a relatively rich country, rich in oil with a relatively high GDP for the region. I have never been to central or west Africa, and had no idea how critical the ‘relative’ was in those statements.

Gabon seems very different then what I expected. There is very little infrastructure. In Libreville, the largest city, the roads are poor, the buildings are old and the amenities are minimal. My team of 4, are staying in a house with about 12 other people, 3 bathrooms and many mosquito nets. The water turns off at 9pm and the bathroom sinks rarely have running water during the day. The temperature is in the 90’s and with the humidity at 95%, it feels like 105. This is especially bad inside, where we work, without air conditioning, making it feel more like 115. Without any luggage for three days straight, working full time in this heat was more than difficult.

Nonetheless the project we’re working on is super exciting, and this is exactly the kind of experience I’ve been wanting. Gabon has one of the most beautiful coastlines in the world. We’re building a strategy for a sustainable partnership between the hydrocarbon industry (oil and gas companies) and local conservation societies to protect the Gabonese coast. In the past, Gabon’s economy has almost completely relied on their natural resources – oil. However, the increasing presence of these companies along the coast is slowing destroying the otherwise untouched, beautiful and unique ecosystem. There are four of us, all students, working on this together for the next three weeks. My team is incredible and we all complement each other really well, each with our own style, but all working well and having fun at the same time.

Meeting people who have been working here for years, I am full of respect, admiration and awe. I honestly don’t know if I could maintain this lifestyle, hopping in and out of countries, not having the little luxuries, which are no longer luxuries to us but givens –toilet seats, running water, hot showers, personal space. On the other hand, their lives are so rich in experience, so culturally exposed, so grateful for the simple pleasures and so indifferent to life’s minor hurdles.

It’s hard to see a country with such resources still struggling. There concept of customer service is lost. Few businesses besides oil are present. In such a beautiful and resource rich country why has so little progress been made? Many people I’ve spoken to say it’s because they were able to rely on oil for so long that there was no need for industry to develop. Gabon is extremely expensive. Due to lack of local industry, almost everything, including food, is imported, leading to very high prices. But in many ways, although it seems under-developed to us, there are many accomplishments. The country is extremely safe, and although surrounded by warring countries, has managed to maintain a significant level of stability. The children are educated and the people seem happy. It’s eye opening to see parts of the world that we rarely think about. It’s a stark realization of how different things are in this world, how uneven things are often distributed; it puts many things in our own lives into perspective.

monkey see, monkey do.

Today was a pretty awesome day. Probably one of the cooler outdoor days I’ve had. Tal and I took a ride out to a lake a few hours west of Nairobi. We rented bikes at a nearby camp and rode through town towards the nearby game park. The town was pretty remote, being a few hours from the city, but also fairly populated. As we rode the 5k through the town, little kids ran to the street and started waving and chanting “how-are-you-how-are-you”. It was pretty cute, but also slightly uncomfortable.

We got to the park and rode in. The game park was set up so that you could see wild life while riding your bike all through the park. We started on the first trail we saw that said 14k, we figured that was a good distance. The trail was awesome, up and down hills, through the mountains. We saw zebra, antelopes, wildebeests, and some other things. Plus, there was no one else around at all, we didn’t run into a single other person, it was pretty cool. Unfortunately the terrain was made of a mix of sand and rocks, which made it pretty hard to bike around, but it was still pretty fun.

After finishing that 14k trail, we realized we had taken the wrong one. It was actually another 7k to the real attraction of the park. So we biked another 7k deeper into the terrain. Once we made it to the center, we were told that in order to see the waterfalls and all the other cool stuff you have to hike an hour down into the rocks. So we did. What we didn’t realize though, was that it was an hour hike, each way. By this time we had no food, had already bide over 20k through sand and were running low on water. Still, hiking through the rocks and waterfalls was pretty amazing. The water was steaming hot, because we were in complete desert, so it was pretty cool.

Once we started hiking we saw a lot more people (apparently people usually just drive to the hike). The rocks were pretty tricky to climb through, and at one point we ran into a family who had a daughter with them trying to climb through these rocks in high heels! Who does that? I cant even wear high heels out at night, let alone rock climb with them! Poor girls, I wish they didn’t feel the need to always dress up so much, they should just let themselves have fun. Anyway, minutes after we ran into them, her heel broke and they turned back.

It was starting to get late so we headed back up after an hour of climbing downwards. We made it to the top again an hour later and it was time to bike 7k back to the park entrance and then another 5k back through the town. I was starving, and thirsty and it was soo hot, but we were almost there, kind of. We started riding and someone yells out at me that I have a flat. We tried to get it fixed but nothing would work. So Tal took the bike and we rode 13k back to our starting point. I was very very grateful Tal took the bike at that point; riding in the sand is not fun, riding a flat in the sand is almost impossible.

It was a super tiring day, about 8 hours of non stop biking and hiking. But it was amazing. We were riding right up to zebra and all these animals; we had to stop in our tracks sometime to let them pass. It was kind of scary actually. The scenery was amazing also. A volcanic mountain in the backdrop, these amazing rocks and gorgeous clouds with blue skies, it was awesome. And so free feeling just riding around in nature like that, it was hard but truly a great day.

if dreams were thunder.

today was an eye opening and heart wrenching day. probably the single most significant day of work i've ever had. its insane what drastically different worlds people are living in on this planet. we hear 'poor' but it's hard to understand what that really means. people shouldn't have to live under the conditions that they do, when so many people people have such a drastically different life. the amount of money the average new yorker spends on rent in one month could change a childs life forever. yes i feel like an infomercial saying that, but its actually true how little money is actually required at the source to make huge differences. without any kind of health care or nutrition, without access to any education, and emerged in a violent and dangerous society, how can we expect anything other than extreme poverty. today we visited children in remote villages who have been through horrible horrible experiences. we interviewed these children for the filming of a documentary on human rights.

we first visited an all girls school in a very remote village in africa. admittedly, it was uncomfortable at first. tal and i were clearly the only white people on the grounds. all eyes turned to our crowd as we walked through. we were introduced to a young girl who had been through a horrific situation. but she had a bright smile that didnt really leave her face, she giggled over most things, hiding her face with her hands as she laughed. she was shy, but seemed happy. she was a small girl in age and size. and i couldnt help but think how strong she must be inside, to go through all of this still smiling. we met another girl who had also been through a traumatic experience just recently. she was so friendly and so eager to meet people. at the end, she asked to exchanged mobile numbers with us, she also, always with a smile.
you think about your life and what we worry about. obviously everything is relative. but that's why perspective is so important. and it's so easily lost when we continue through life as we know it, and only as we know it. i get stressed about work. work seems meaningless in light of all the other things that i have. and i can't even fathom the challenges, emotionally and physically that so many little kids, have to face every day. nothing in my life even comes close to that. and i do realize im speaking in cliches right now, but i cant help it.

after the school we went further into the town. we picked up an old man on the street in our car and drove him to his hut. there we met his family and heard their story. there were about 11 kids running around the field when we got there. the looks on their faces when they saw us, tal and i, were shocked, confused, even scared sometimes. excited other times. it helped when we smiled. smiling is universal, its comforting. walking to the hut, with 11 kids running all around us, i tripped on a branch. i laughed to myself and looking around, saw a few little boys behind me laughing too. i smiled at them and shook my head in embarrassment and they all started giggling. its nice to know, that no matter how different people seem, they can still share moments and laugh together, even if it is at my expense.

i dont want to get into the details of what each family has been through. but we continued the day visiting victims of tragedies. we are very lucky. and many people, many children, are very unlucky, in a very very bad way. it's frustrating to think about how to make an impact on such an enormous problem. and sad to think that just miles away people are living in conditions that most of us would never even imagine.

sweet thing.

It finally came. Today was my last day in LA. Six months ago, I never would have thought I’d have given up my east village apt to spend five and a half months in Monrovia, a tiny suburb of Los Angeles, lined with fast food chains and highways. It was a rough situation at first, for many reasons. For a long time all I could think about was getting out of my situation and ‘going abroad’, the deal I was promised. I think it was at the point when I finally allowed myself to realize that I would be spending most of my time in CA, that I also allowed myself to accept what the experience, in itself, had to offer.

With all said and done, in complete and all honesty, I don’t think I would have asked for anything to turn out differently. The past six months wasn’t exactly what I signed up for, but it’s led to more things than I could have expected. Sometimes things have a funny way of working out.

So bye bye LA, it's been fun. Africa, I'll see you tomorrow. And San Francisco, can't wait to see you when I get back.

cause what would we be, without wishful thinking.

sometimes, the greatest things are the simple things. this past weekend i drove up the coast on highway one. i was visiting some friends in SF. i couldnt really find anyone to go with, but i really didn't mind going by myself, despite people's shock that i actually enjoyed doing the coastline on my own, it was pretty perfect. the views were basically amazing, around every turn it just got better and better for hours. i stopped a few times to take some photos and hike around. i got myself a big sandwich at a little market in the big sur and hiked through one of the state parks down to the shore. i found a perfect seat on a pile of enormous logs, watched the ocean, the sky was bright blue, and just kind of enjoyed. it seemed like there was nothing but beauty around for miles, and life seemed pretty perfect. in my car, blue sky, oceans on my left, mountains on my right, my favorite music playing, singing as loud as i could, it just made me smile.

i really like listening to music. and i dont mean just having music played. i like turning it loud and listening to every single line of a good song. hearing it, feeling it. it brings out feelings that on a day to day basis just get pushed deeper and ignored, when in my opinion, they're one of the most important things to realize. so i drove, and i listened, and i sang, and i watched, and i had an amazing time, on highway one.

the rest of the weekend was equally as perfect. it's really nice to be in the company of good friends. people that you actually truly like and care about, and there's no pretending involved. it's also equally nice to meet new people that you also truly like as people, and may also one day, be good friends. my weekend was mixed with both, and it felt really nice. and you never really know if the new things will turn into true things, but that's ok. it's a refreshing reminder that there are a lot of good people out there. it keeps you hoping, it keeps you smiling, and it keeps you wishing.

i like san francisco, a lot. there's a very apparent difference between SF and LA that you can feel creeping in from the moment you move north. i'll expand later. still no movement out of the states, as you can tell. but im trying to make the best of it, and do a bit of exploring out here on the west coast...

dancin' out on 7th street.

i'm back in new york for the week. most amazing fourth of july party ever. the photo was on the front page of the ny times. there was a kiddie pool.

so tired, will elaborate soon :)

oh. PLEASE SEND ME YOUR PHONE NUMBER - i broke my phone. thanks!

party - if you look close, im right under the "i" - wearing a black dress

well i hope that i don't fall in love with you.

so i'm in london, just for a few nights. i've been working the past two nights, but tonight, i wasn't doing much. i could've called friends i know who live here, or gone out with some people from training, but i really just wanted to relax. i feel kind of bad, i'm all the way in london and all i wanted to do was go for a run and fall asleep. so thats what i did, and it felt really good. but after about 11pm, when i had slept for a few hours and ran a few miles, i decided to go for a walk.

it's a friday night, and im in london. i find it strange that i'm not more compelled to go out, hit the pubs, etc etc. i guess traveling so much lately, has kind of really made me tired of the superficial meeting people in bars for a night, having fun and somewhat meaningless conversation, and never seeing them again. obviously meeting new people expands your awareness, makes things interesting, is exciting and all that stuff. but i've been meeting people on and off for a while now, and its great learning personalities from all over, but now im looking more for something a bit stronger i guess. and sometimes, that strength is satisfied more by spending time alone, figuring out yourself, then by meeting as many people as you can in one night.

so anyway, all of that aside, after i finished my run, i decided, what the heck, i'm in london, let me at least go have a pint of something. so i started to wander. after quite a long walk, i came across a bar that was playing really good music and looked relatively crowded. i wanted to go in, but i was nervous, i was by myself, and thats just a bit weird. but then i walked back, why not. so i went to the bar by myself and ordered a pint.

i started talking to the bartender, i asked him what beer was the most british, and what he recommended. he ended up buying me his favorite. he said - if i was only here for a night, he better take care of me. the beer was actually really good and we chatted for a bit. he had a really sincere smile, that just made me feel really happy. but i still felt kind of odd being there alone, so after i finished my beer, i began to head out. i couldn't help but smile at him as i left - he was very nice, and in the 10 minutes we chatted, i felt like i would have liked to stay much longer. but i left, and we smiled, and that was that.

there are so many people out there to meet and so many things to discover. everywhere i go i feel like i want to experience a place more, stay longer. sometimes i'm afraid i'll never be ultimately happy because of the urge to keep exploring. and normally i'm a sucker for 'lost opportunities', but i'm learning that sometimes leaving things simple, with a sleep, a run and smile is just as nice as anything else.